Woke up this morning. Called and texted David. Left a voicemail. Went online, hit him up on AIM. But, nothing... No call back, no text, no IM. Nothing.
Got into a car accident . Going straight and this guy side-swiped me. I was so rattled and scared-- my body was shaking. This is the second car accident in two months. I have no faith in my driving abilities... I feel like crap. Insurance is gonna shoot straight up. I'm probably gonna cause another accident next month... I don't want to drive anymore... I hate putting my parents through this-- I can't drive worth shit.
Called up David after things calmed down. He didn't pick up. Texted him twice. Finally, he called. ... Speechless. I can't expect him to pick up whenever I want him too-- I understand that... He in no way could have foreseen this, I know... But I needed him to comfort me and he wasn't in reach and it bothers me. It bothers me more that-- that it was around 3PM and that he hadn't given me a call this morning once he woke up or when he was available... My exes used to do that... They used to call once they woke up... Or they'll call to wake me up... They wouldn't go about their day and forget all about me... They would call before 3PM definitely... Well, I didn't want to talk to him... Feel like-- he couldn't be there for me... Started feeling numb and dead inside. Told him to check his text messages and I hung up. Minute later, he tried calling and texting me after realizing I got into an accident. I didn't need comfort from him anymore... I just felt dead.
We spoke once or twice more later on. But.... I didn't need his comfort anymore... Too late. Maybe I expect too much from him.
Posted at 11:37 pm by bunni_lee